From the unreleased obituary,
Here lies John McCain, former babysitter to Joe Lieberman, who became senile after losing the vice-presidency in 2008. Lieberman who in a death pact blackmailed McCain into dressing as Richard Nixon and waltzing into the room and announcing like William F. Buckley that each day had begun at least a dozen times. McCain also has to read Mein Kampf to Lieberman while crouched over a portrait of Prescott Bush.
- Chris Mansel