Friday, August 22, 2008

Mansel: McCain's Secret Obit

From the unreleased obituary,

Here lies John McCain, former babysitter to Joe Lieberman, who became senile after losing the vice-presidency in 2008. Lieberman who in a death pact blackmailed McCain into dressing as Richard Nixon and waltzing into the room and announcing like William F. Buckley that each day had begun at least a dozen times. McCain also has to read Mein Kampf to Lieberman while crouched over a portrait of Prescott Bush.

- Chris Mansel

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Mind of Mansel: McCain Top Ten

The John McCain Top 10

1. It is said that McCain has begun refusing meat in order to sharpen his teeth.
2. John McCain never sodomized a rubber chicken dinner he didn't like.
3. When it comes to medication on the campaign trail John McCain sets his sights on pharmaceutical cocaine and human growth hormone.
4. John McCain is banned from Howard Johnson for urinating polling results onto linen napkins.
5. In Chicago recently John McCain appeared in a publicity photo dressed as a cheerleader with a gland condition.
6. John McCain believes a bungled execution is a good execution.
7. McCain thought a guillotine was a new hybrid.
8. Once during a game of billiards John McCain was heard to shout, "Chalk it, like they do in Saigon!"
9. When asked if he would pardon any African-Americans when in office McCain replied why has Obama committed a crime?
10. Lynne Cheney's new book is called, Laura: The Prostrate Years.

- Chris Mansel

Jake's Word re: The Devil Down in Georgia

[Response to Jack Random's "The Devil Down in Georgia" (below).]

Absolutely. This is the best possible circumstance for the neocons. The war against terrorism is difficult to perpetuate endlessly because the public grows tired of fighting a vague, invisible, uncertain enemy. But the majority of the U.S. public remembers the Cold War very well and that makes it easier to sell. It involves certainties. Russia, drunk with new wealth and a new epoch of Czars, has recovered from its experiment with liberal democracy and reasserts itself as a superpower once again. The neocons must be ecstatic. This is the global politics they trained in and understand so well. It is the philosophical heart of the Project for a New American Century. Both the leadership in Moscow and Washington are well aware the game is back on and they settle in for the deep freeze behind mountains of wealth.

Indeed, what could Saakashvili have been thinking? I find it hard to believe he could be so ignorant of history, of the crimes of the Bush administration or the eagerness of Russia to reassert itself. Perhaps he is deeply invested in the military-industrial complex. Perhaps he is willing to sacrifice the safety of his own citizens in order to be part of the new front line - an egomaniacal delusion in which he is a heroic political soldier for democracy.

As usual, the bottom line is the bottom line and the price is paid in human blood. Human sacrifice by any other name is still barbarous and the 21st century barbarians could not be more obvious.


Resurrecting the Cold War

By Jack Random

“In the 21st century nations do not invade other nations.”

Senator John McCain, August 13, 2008

It is inconceivable that a major candidate for president of the United States of America should be unaware that the government he wishes to lead began the 21st century with a foreign policy of aggressive war and military domination christened by the invasions of two sovereign nations.

When that candidate is a long-standing political front man for the Neoconservative brain trust that authored the policy (Project for a New American Century), it strains the last fibers of credulity. For a man who considers himself a foreign policy expert, Senator John McCain has taken his place alongside our brash lame duck president as an embarrassment to the nation.

Is he demented? Does he consider our actions in Afghanistan and Iraq incursions, diplomatic overtures or simply humanitarian assistance?

As Vladimir Putin might say: If Iraq is an incursion then Russia’s actions in neighboring Georgia are little more than a firm handshake.

Not to be outdone, our president took a respite between vacations to issue a warning reminiscent of a former era but it played more like a bullied child: If you don’t stop now, I’m not going to be your friend any more!

One of the more fascinating aspects of the American response has been substituting references to Georgia with Iraq and Russia with America. Consider transcriptions of these gems from the mouth of our clueless leader:

“[Iraq’s] sovereignty and territorial integrity must be respected. [Washington] must live up to its commitment to withdraw its invading forces from all [Iraqi] territory.”

This one does not require transcription:

“Bullying and intimidation are not acceptable ways to conduct foreign policy in the 21st century.”

Are John McCain and little George reading from the same script?

What is most puzzling in this conflict is the behavior of Georgian president Mikheil Saakashvili who triggered the Russian response by taking military action in South Ossetia. The reaction was as predictable as the salivation of Pavlov’s dogs but Saakashvili seems perplexed that America and her allies have not rushed to his government’s defense.

Is the man insane? Did he really think that America, with its forces bogged down in two major occupations, was eager to start another war with Russia on the Russian border?

If he is not a madman then someone made promises they had no intention of honoring.

If Saakashvili has not yet awakened to the fact that he and his nation are sacrificial pawns in this game of international chess, he soon will. His mentor-ally in the United States wasted no time pushing through a missile defense agreement with Poland – a move that every objective observer knows is not directed at Iran or “rogue states” but at Moscow.

Not content with the damage they have already done to America’s standing in the world, the neoconservative horror factory still in charge of our foreign policy (along with their profiteering allies in the military industrial complex) have used the waning days of the Bush White House to put in place the necessary elements for a return to the Cold War – a war that was never cold and cost millions of innocent lives culminating in Vietnam.

Are we safer now, Mr. President?

Pay no attention to the ravings of John McCain. He is not president and his ignorance in critical matters of foreign policy is so profound it numbs the mind. We are not going to war on the Russian border. We will not severe the primary source of Europe’s energy supply. We will not risk a military confrontation between nuclear powers to bolster the government of Mikheil Saakashvili.

We are not completely insane.

We will however return to the insanity of an arms race – nuclear and otherwise – pitting us against the Russians with the Chinese content for now to sit this one out.

If the policies of intimidation and confrontation continue, there will be wars with nations such as Georgia and Ukraine serving as our proxies.

There will be blood and there will be blood money for corporate mercenaries and arms dealers.

The devil has come to Georgia but he is not Vladimir Putin. Russia is only acting as we would act if a major foreign power came to our border – as we would have if the Soviets had not backed down when they attempted to plant missiles in Cuba circa 1962.

No. The devil down in Georgia wears the familiar mask of the Neocon. The names behind the mask are Wolfowitz, Perle, Bolton, Abrams, Kristol, Khalilzad, Bush, Cheney and McCain.

They have bankrupted the nation, morally and economically, but they have profited perversely from the effort. They have never lost hold of the dream that is the world’s nightmare.

They will not stop pushing until we reach the endgame of world domination or mass annihilation or both.

Rest assured, if we allow the Project for a New American Century to move forward, the world will awaken, all but a few of our allies will peel away, and America will stand and fall alone.


[See “John McCain and the Project for a New American Century” by Joseph A. Palermo, The Huffington Post, June 18, 2008.]