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Thursday, November 04, 2010

Election Day 2010 (A Voter's Guide) 

By Jake Berry



Choose a thick cut - 


preferably a fat ham. 




Drill a small hole through it. 


Insert a spark plug into the wound.


Wrap a live wire around its tip. 




Insert a tube

into the opposite end of the wound.

Pour gasoline down the tube. 




Observe how the flesh leaps.


Keep the gasoline coming.



The flesh is twitching now,

moving across the floor.

Call it a meat engine.



Clothe the entire apparatus

in a large flag.



Toss it out into the yard.



Keep the gasoline coming.



When it rains

observe how the convulsions surrender

and reignite

and thick smoke rises.




Inhale the stench. 




Keep the gasoline coming.

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